Stinson’s Choice

Have you guys ever seen the movie “Sophie’s Choice”?  Well, that’s what last night was like for me.  I had to make one of the most difficult decisions of my entire life: deciding which strip club would receive my stamp of approval.  As you know by now, I ultimately chose to take my talents to…

Jury Booty

  My buddy recently tried a court case in front of an all-female jury. This was probably the best chance he’ll ever have to score a 13-way but of course he blew it because he’s “married.” What a waste! You see, when you’re litigating a case in front of a jury, you’re basically the star…

Splitsville

 

The Stinsonian Calendar

THE STINSONIAN CALENDAR I’ve just added another holiday to my calendar year: Bangtoberfest! Until this point there was a long dry spell from the In-da-peen-dence Day to Slutoween. Three long months with no particular reason to bang a chick… save for the usual ones: boobs, really big boobs, and if-you-squint-your-eyes-she-kinda-reminds-you-of-your-third-grade-teacher. But no more! Now Bangtoberfest…

Phone Sex Mad-Libs

In your lifetime as a Bro, you will undoubtedly be called upon numerous times to seduce a woman over the phone. That’s just life. To help you along when you eventually get the call to make the call, I’ve crafted this easy-to-follow script. It’s in Brolib form, so simply write down your answers and then…

The Pre-Shtup

You never want a one-night stand to become clingy.  That’s just common sense.  So do what I do: draw up a contract so you’re both on the same page.   Just grab a napkin and jot down a few casual ground rules.  For example, here’s my napkin from last night…    

3 new motivational posters available

Dear bros, I have some good news… 1. There are 3 new motivational posters available in the motivational posters store and you can use this coupon code to get 20% off: 635NF1YNNWG2 (can be used for all posters, not only the new ones, but for limited time only)                  …

Interrogation room, sweet interrogation room

Bros, In my prolific life as the ultimate bro, I’ve often found myself stuck inside a place I’d rather not be. (And I’m not talking about that Persian lady. You know who you are, K. Kardashian.) I’m talking about interrogation rooms. If you’re ever being held in a backroom, ask them to point to the…

The great Barndini

POOF! The Great Barndini returns! Today, as always, I’m here to educate you in the field of chick-pickuppery. But this time I’ve got a little something up my sleeve. Well, it’s not that little. It’s actually a decent size. I mean, it’s not gonna win any contests, but it’s not like you need a microsco–…

Come work for Goliath National Bank

 

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