Barney's Blog


Forget every other rule I’ve ever stated because every other rule I’ve ever stated is old and I have only one rule: New is always better. That being said, there are some places on the Earth, older places – that are pretty cool and shouldn’t necessarily be replaced by newer ones or augmented with bigger boobs.

Below is a list of locations that have earned “landmark” status in my own life.

MY BED: The epicenter of awesomeness. It should be preserved and studied for future generations; many of whom may have been conceived in, on, or under it.

JESSE LANGDORF’S CHILDHOOD HOUSE: Who is Jesse Langdorf? Shame on you for not knowing he was the American tailor who invented the all-weather wrinkle free neck-tie. Pay homage.

CIRO’S PIZZERIA, EAST MEADOW, NY: Drunk, stranded, and disoriented after learning the exciting way why they’re called bridge and tunnel chicks, this local pizza joint totally Bro’d me out with two slices and a half dozen g-knots before directing me to the nearest train station.

World famous arena home to countless classic boxing matches, basketball games, and concerts, this hallowed ground also played host to a thrilling, white-knuckle overtime event in section 323 during an otherwise ho-hum Rangers’ game between me, a chick named Cindy, and her flexible friend; Sarah? Sasha? Something with an “S” :)

MACLAREN’S BATHROOM: Where I met my best friend Ted Mosby and totally changed his life. Also where I met many of Ted’s dates and totally changed their lives for a solid 5 to 7 minutes. Shhhh!

Cool building that resembles a giant, Art Deco penis.

LUSTY LEOPARD VIP ROOM: Let’s just say you’ll need an ultraviolet light to see my signature.

LINCOLN CENTER FOR THE PERFORMING ARTS: What? A Bro can’t take an evening off and enjoy the Royal Shakespeare Company? Jeeze Louise. Also, I once banged a ballerina backstage.

THE ARCADIAN: Hahahaha! Totally kidding. Tear that bitch down.

SAL’S LASER TAG EMPORIUM, WEST NYACK, NY: A young, unranked laser tag player wins his first invisibility match (and coupon for 1 free funnel cake). That player’s name? Barney Stinson. True story.

  • Kushal

    hey dude u r awesome i m not writing bro u know y …. just started reading ur book The Bro Code !!!! Well i m frm India & a huge fan of urs keep it up Barnical….

  • I just read ‘The Playbook’. It is totally legen- wait for it… a little longer…that’s it-DARY! 😀

  • Diana Air

    I wish that you were for real, cause I would totally date you!

  • johnnyfrom2035

    here it is Johnny, I have decided to open a Blog to share all the informations which i have collected in this two years, about Reptilians, about our Future, about alien’s races living on our planet hidden beetween us.
    You will be able to share comments, make questions, contact other users, post images, videos, proofs, and your experience about UFO.
    I ask you all to share this blog to let this project start in the best way.

  • BogoBog

    Cool story bro.

  • Oh Barney, I hope to meet you someday. You are such an inspiration!

  • Carlos

    Just awesome! read the blog every day!

  • Big Dan

    You ultimate man Barney Stinson!!

  • You are so cool.

  • Nazblue

    Dude , u hv changed my view of Empire State Building like forever…..!!!!

  • Simon

    Love the How i Met Your Mother episodes when you sing, best singer… wait for it… EVER!!!! True Story

  • Legen…wait for it…. DARY!

  • Barney junior

    Dude u are like a god to me,.. I don’t mind just being ur rebound bro coz if I ever meet u I’ll say this one thing that’ll totally surprise u.. N I’m pretty sure u will be my wingman someday

  • Guest
  • Andy

    Barney, you are by far the smartest man I know. Please fill my mind with more of your immaculate wisdom…

  • Does this mean, that we haven’t to buy ‘The Bro-Code’?

  • Frida Norman

    Barney, i dont know what to say.. You’r like my god and inspiration.
    Keep on writing.

  • Kvtomi

    please vote for Barney Stinson :)) thx

  • Carlos_CL

    My god! A couple months ago I visited this almost every day without any update, stopped for a couple weeks and now we have like 8 new entries! Awesome, keep this going bro!

    Cya broda!