Barney's Blog

Kicked in the donuts

Okay, not to get all Jerry Seinfeld, but what is the deal with Canadians and donuts? Per capita, Canadians consume more donuts than every Asian country combined. That’s an actual fact. Look it up.

Dying to know what the fascination was with these donuts, I sampled a random dozen. Here are my reviews…

CHOCOLATE GLAZED – The black crust of this delicacy comforts Canadians who spend upwards of thirteen months a year without the sun. Also, based on my time spent there, they add a much-needed sprinkle of diversity.

POWDERED JELLY – Jelly filled white dough? Doesn’t get any more Canadian than that.

BEIGNETS – The only thing worse than a doughnut, is a French doughnut.

BOSTON CRÈME – I used to bang a girl from Boston, and let’s just say—actually I don’t think we can say it. (Checking) Nope. We can’t say it. Family blog and whatnot.

BEAR CLAW – This paw shaped doughnut is a mockery to everything that is food. So a regular doughnut wasn’t big enough for you people? You needed a doughnut with a handle? I’ll never understand why we still let you be a country.

APPLE FRITTERS – Dammit, Canada. Apples are American! They are as American as monster trucks, violence, and inefficient/expensive medical care! Back off!

DONUT HOLES – A smaller version of your beloved donuts. I assume these are used to wean the more desperate cases of fatties off their precious vices. “Hey Gordie, don’t eat that bear claw, just eat like, I don’t know, a hundred doughnut holes.” “Gee, thanks! That’s way healthier, ‘eh?” “God, we’re stupid, ‘eh?” “’Eh!” And then they repeat that entire exchange in French, because they have to.

  • u.k bro

    Fellow bro from England here and I can’t comment on the donuts thing as our food is terrible. Keep up the awesome blog bro and keep being awesome.

    • applegogo

      same but barney England have Bramley apple pie, cant get more apple than that

      • yomama

        i am also uk but we do have apple pie soooooo

  • Kiara

    Do u have twitter? You’re awesome!

  • bahman

    awsome! keep up the awsome blog bro.

  • hjuifzhiouz

    i love tv show how i met your mother and its aws wait for it ome

  • Gama Revolver

    Dude i´m a very big fan of the show… But ¡ ¡ ¡ I really wanna know if this blog is connected with the serie. Could you make a joke about me in the show just to know how awesome this show is ???? If u do that i promise to make this viral.

    • yomama

      that is ga ………..wait for it ……. aaayyy

    • yomama

      i bet you just made 8 accounts so you could like it you gay

      • aman


  • Urs Robin….

    I’m a big fan of urs sir… u r seriously awesum….!!!!! :)

  • Super Julie Braun

    Donuts are sold at every corner and intersection in CA…there are always plenty to go around.

  • Robin

    Neil! Why you gay? I so wish you weren’t gay. I would’ve hunted you down from the ends of the earth and banged you. 😛

  • Haha

    Legen wait for it… Dary

  • Dylan Mendes

    You’re too fabulous!! But i’ve heard that the 9the season is the last one, WHY?? 😉

    • Alyssa

      I’ve heard there was some conflicts between two actors, but that could be inaccurate.

  • theblade

    god made neil gay because no man would have a chance with any woman

  • Ted..!!!!

    Awe…..(Wait for it)…..Some….Awesome…..


    SO true Canadians eat way to many donuts and with their marriages aren’t serious just like their Army or their Money.

  • Lorenzina Von Matterhorn

    If Swarkles wasnt so cool i’d be in love with you. Le’s jus say “falafel”.

  • Kanadator Sherbatsky

    You and Robin makes a awesome couple, but I think this: Robin + Ted = FOREVER.

  • Johnny Tears

    Love the Show Barney keep up the good work

  • Hannoie

    Fun fact: If you write Neil in google’s search field, the second first option is Neil Armstrong. I think you can guess who’s the very first…


    Just a heads up, the bear claw is so popular up there because its the only pastry that reminds them of summers in the park. Faced with bears, the natural friend of Canadians …. Duh

  • KFC

    Yes,its right ,but this Kanada

  • lol35

    is kanada XD

  • steve

    tu es hallu … cinant, tu es le meilleur.Tu me fais delirer dans la serie
    j aimerai etre comme toi avec le costume

    GO ON!!!

  • Barney Stinson

    I am legen….I willfinishthesecondpartofthiswordwhentheseasonstarts..

  • anonymous barney fan

    shut up!!! barney is awesome gay or not gay. you try being like him ; you wouldn’t last a day. GO NEIL.
    ur awesome and legen..wait for… dary 😉

  • Sodaaa

    Weird thing is… this blog is 2013. Although, the show is about Ted telling his children about how he met their mother, which is told in 2025? Barney should be in his late 40’s or early 50’s. Totally confuzzled.